My Eurovision drinking game & rules

Ok, those who know me will know that I’m a Eurovision tragic.

The three nights of the year SBS broadcasts the contest are permanently etched in my diary. Nothing, save the last days or a hot women offering me pleasure, will take me away from these three hilarious nights of terrible costumes, horrible voices, and hilarious snark.

And despite not being a drinker, I think it’s important for others to enjoy Eurovision whilst drunk. Shots, wine, absinthe – skull down whatever you keep as your favourite poison during the show.

To make it fun, here’s my rules for a Eurovision drinking game.

A word of warning. If you’re going to play this properly, please be a responsible host – and make sure you have a spare bed for your guests to sleep in rather than them risking their life on the roads.


Simple, each time one of these things happen – you have to take a drink.

Entire glass/bottle

  • UK or Ireland win (will be needed to survive their encore performance)
  • Obvious miming

Three shots/Skull

  • Wardrobe malfunction
  • Singing in invented languages
  • French entrant sings in English
  • Use of a water feature in an act

Two shots/Big gulp

  • Fireworks, pyrotechnics
  • Singer who evokes Adele undertones (gender doesn’t matter)
  • Lead singer with tattoos
  • Wind machines
  • Martial arts moves
  • Artists or their backups wearing leather or similar
  • Burlesque outfits
  • Any time Israel is mentioned
  • Strobe lighting

One shot/Sip

  • Buff men sans shirt
  • Anytime the UK is awarded points
  • Use of ethnic instrument
  • Country’s points presenter unnecessarily drags out announcing their votes
  • Any time the audience is heard booing the current act or country’s points announcement

Happy drinking!

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